OGR - 06/02/2019

Ogr 06022019 by on Scribd

Life Drawing: https://tedsuniblog.blogspot.com/2018/11/life-drawing-session-19th-november.html
Soundscapes: https://tedsuniblog.blogspot.com/search/label/soundscape
Animation: https://tedsuniblog.blogspot.com/search/label/Adobe%20Animate
Maya: https://tedsuniblog.blogspot.com/search/label/Maya
Character Design: https://tedsuniblog.blogspot.com/search/label/character%20design
Film Reviews: https://tedsuniblog.blogspot.com/search/label/Film%20Review

Comments

  1. OGR 07/02/2019

    Hi Ted - so in general terms, yes, everything is working here and your story conveys in terms of storyboarding. I do think there are some opportunities to 'unpack' some of your action more dynamically in terms of your screen direction: for example, the hunter's quest to capture the butterfly is dealt with via single drawings, when I think you need to think about a greater variety of shots/angles to better show the chase - so more cutting between the butterfly, the swooshing of the net, the hunter's face and back and forth etc. Doing this will convey the hunter's frustration more subjectively to the audience (they will be feeling it as opposed to just watching it) and I think the pace and excitement will be enhanced.

    I think you're missing some important establishing shots too: when we arrive in the flat, I think we need to see much more 'mise-en-scene' evidence helping us understand more about this character and his hobby - this is implied in your storyboard, but again I think you need to 'draw/show' a bit more - maybe consider a moving shot at the beginning of the film that pans around the room before arriving at the close-up of the hunter working - that panning shot could take in lots of little details in the room to establish the character before we see him.

    I was thinking that perhaps, when the hunter opens the box, you might decide to shoot that moment with the camera inside the box looking up at your character's face so we can see his delight - again - a choice of shot that just gives your story a bit 'extra'.

    Your character design is promising - he looks piggish and unpleasant - much much to improve and refine here. I think you need to consider simplifying your giant butterfly a bit more because this first drawing is less a character design, and more a digital painting of a butterfly... for example:

    http://seinakashima.com/characters/

    (I don't mean it has to be cute like this example, I just mean that it's a character design, which requires simplification and some personality - your butterfly isn't just a big scary bug, it's like 'Mr Justice' has turned up, so you need to think about the principles of character design you've been learning with Justin).

    I feel the same way about your tower block and your interior - these are just 'paintings of things' at the moment - not designs of things; you've also got a 'line art' style in your characters, but not in your interior - I'm going to ask you to look at some actual animation backgrounds etc to give you a sense of working more towards something stylised and 'fit-for-purpose'...

    https://www.pinterest.co.uk/pin/348536458660614963/

    and also this:

    http://www.michaelspornanimation.com/splog/?p=2896

    Just take note of the use of tidy, clean line art, detail, and how the shading is produced etc. I think you need to clean and crisp everything up if you're going to achieve that illustrative 60s vibe...

    So - story works, but you need to commit to the action of your story more in terms of drawing, and you need to take more bold, stylised steps towards achieving a more illustrative look... Also check out Sylvain Chomet's The Illusionist for more of the similar vibe...

    https://www.pinterest.co.uk/pin/179932947582093305/?lp=true

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